I don’t need rainbows anymore.

I need time bent backwards, forwards and around

to when you were still here.

I need mornings with tea and quiet crosswords and sleepy smiles again.

Moments that are now somehow memories,

I need them real.

I don’t need pictures and comments on social media sites,

Static reminders smiling and laughing on the page,

like a symphony of longing and distance in tune to a rhythm that makes no sense because you are not here to play.

I need hugs and closeness,

your papery skin and your voice,

phone calls and laughter just because.

I need encouragement and concern and enthusiasm I can get annoyed with,

earnest conversations about everything and all at once,

full of rage, light, truth

and love.

I don’t need rainbows anymore.

I know you made them by convincing the light to dance with the crystal until delirium caused time to split into a thousand particles,

so that joy and stars flickered around the room.

Where have you gone?

I need time bent backwards and forwards and around,

to anywhere,

to a time when you were still here.


I Don’t Need Rainbows
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